Using These Lessons Will Make Father’s Day (and every day) AMAHHHHZING

 

So here is a little follow-up piece to the article I wrote for Mother’s day.

 

Because although my mom continues to teach me amazing new lessons about enjoying life and fearlessly pursuing my passion even when conventional logic says not to, my Dad has also experienced a profound amount of growth and badass development since my mom passed away.

 

And this growth has had a huge impact on me as a person in guiding me toward living a happier, more fulfilled life. And I continue to learn from him every day.

 

And these lessons my dad has taught me in the years since my mom died will instantaneously have a positive impact on how you approach each day as well.

 

So now i’m passing them on to you.

 

PS- my dad and I have always loved each other deeply, but we have never been too great at ‘expressing it’.

 

(this kinda sums it up)

So bare with me as this is my first real crack at letting him know I awesome I think he is.

 

 

LESSON 1- YOU CAN BE VULNERABLE WHILE STILL BEING UNBREAKABLE

 

I have quietly watched from afar as my dad has done battle with some SERIOUS demons.

 

He probably hates that i’m here putting his business in the street, but on numerous occasions I have seen him go toe-to-toe with pure darkness, and emerge on the other side a stronger human being.

 

I have seen him lose his job.

 

I have seen him incapacitated by depression.

 

I have seen him crying on a hospital floor after facing the realization that he only had 1 more chance to say goodbye to his wife.

 

I have seen him bend.

 

I have seen him battered.

 

I have seen him get broken down and scarred.

 

But I have NEVER seen him break.

 

I have never seen him lose hope and lose sight of the light that makes life intensely purposeful and amazing.

 

Each time life has thrown some nasty shit his way, he has taken it on the chin and finds a way to ferociously march forward, refusing to surrender and lose the spark that makes him who he is.

 

So thanks for showing me it’s okay to bend a bit when life gets tough.

 

It’s okay to get knocked down and get scared for a while.

 

But whatever happens, you can’t break. You can’t lose touch of that thing inside that makes you a human being who was engineered to live a life you love.

 

LESSON 2- BE YOU (and screw anyone who isn’t down with that)

 

 

My dad likes to live his life LOUD. And he really doesn’t care what you think about it.

 

He likes to FaceTime in public and scream into his phone in crowded restaurants because he’d rather see his kids when he calls them.

 

He likes to make his opinion known if he thinks that a certain food sucks or a beer taste like crap.

 

He likes to have a few drinks and let his rowdy humor offend whatever poor soul is within earshot of hearing it.

 

But here’s the thing.

 

My dad is too busy living life and enjoying each moment to possibly give a shit about what you or I think of him.

 

My dad is too busy seizing moments and being comfortable in his own skin to worry about being judged.

 

Because my dad has fully embraced that the only way to be happy is to truly and unapologetically be yourself.

 

So thank you dad, for showing me to fearlessly be myself and enjoy every minute of it.

 

 

LESSON 3- IT IS NEVER TOO LATE TO CHANGE YOUR COURSE

 

My dad has always been a loving and supportive father.

 

But he and I can both agree, for my first 23 years on this earth we sucked at expressing our appreciation for one another.

 

During conversations, we kept it light and surfacey.

 

We talked sports, or he yelled at me for not being serious about my future.

 

When it came to Christmas and birthdays, my mom wrote the heartfelt cards. Then my dad would swoop in for a quick hug…..and then yell at me for not being serious about my future.

 

I know he busted his ass to give me access to a great education and amazing opportunities, and we always had this unspoken acknowledgement that I was indebted to him for letting me financially mooch off of him  until I finished college.

 

But we never took the time to let the other know how we felt. That just wasn’t our style.

 

But that all changed when my mom died.

 

During a time when my family needed it most, my dad transformed.

 

He softened up.

 

He opened up.

 

And he let us know how he felt.

 

And because of it, he has brought my family closer together than ever.

 

And  even though things were one way for 23 years, my dad was able to grow and evolve and shed his past behaviors.

 

So thank you dad, for showing me that you can always adopt a better way of doing things to make life better for those you care about.

 

 

LESSON 4- FEARLESSLY WORK YOUR ASS OFF

 

Now this one seems like a cliche, right?

 

“Work hard if you want to succeed in life”.

 

Duh, everyone knows that.

 

But here’s the thing.

 

Most of us have the completely wrong intention when we go about completing our ‘hard work’.

 

We play it safe.

 

We work hard as long as we’re playing by the rules and coloring within the lines.

 

We work hard in the conventional sense to perpetuate our safety and self-interpreted status quo.

 

We find ways to keep ourselves busy to the point of exhaustion, but are actually marching forward with our work and doing something that’s worthwhile?

 

My dad has taught me that it’s not enough just to bust your ass.

 

You need to work hard AND have direction and purpose.

 

If you want to build something great and accomplish something amazing and impactful, you need to be willing to relentlessly pursue a goal even if there are no guaranteed pay-offs.

 

You need to claw forward with power and persistence even if you don’t know what reward (if any) awaits you.

 

So thank you dad, for showing me that hard work fueled by faith and purpose is the only work worth doing.

 

 

LESSON 5- MAKE A DIFFERENCE

 

When my mom died, a light went off in my dad’s head.

 

I could see he was beginning to change the way he thought about life.

 

I could tell he began to perceive the world differently.

 

And in a very short time, it became clear that my dad had one purpose- leave this world a better place than when he found it.

 

Instead of letting the loss of his wife sideline him for the rest of his days, my dad has bounced back with a benevolent vengeance.

 

He has selflessly immersed himself into noble pursuits as he works tirelessly to lift others up and spread joy.

 

He volunteers time.

 

He donates money.

 

He gets down in the trenches and fights alongside those who are battling terrible diseases.

 

He provides encouragement and support and love and light.

 

And as he does all of this, he doesn’t expect a goddamn thing in return.

 

He does it because it’s now part of him.

 

He does it because he fearlessly embraces life’s ups and downs, and he grows as a person every time he gives of himself.

 

So thank you dad, for showing me that significance  outweighs success any day of the week.

 

HAPPY FATHER’S DAY

 

So to my dad, this is my way of saying ‘Happy Father’s Day’ to you (so don’t be expecting a gift…this gets me off the hook).

 

And for everyone else, let the father in your life know how much he means to you, and don’t forget to utilize some of the badass lessons he has taught you.

 

Keep kicking ass and enjoying life 🙂

 

OH AND ONE LAST (IMPORTANT) THING

If this brightened your day, odds are it’s going to brighten someone else’s too!

So hit the little ‘share’ button right below this to spread some love and positivity into the world!

 

 

6 responses to “5 Amazing Things My Dad Has Taught Me (since my mom died)

  1. Jewels;

    Very nice kid, your Dad is very proud of all of you and you guys are his Rocks.
    Keep up the good Work!
    Mr. S

  2. Your dad shared this with us last night. I’m truly moved and he’s a lucky dad. Our families go back to the early days in brecksville. Your mom was amazing. Our daughters played soccer together on the team she founded. The lessons and blessings run deep. Your dad’s face was beaming when he talked
    About you, the girls and the grand babies that will be arriving soon. He is a very proud dad!

  3. Wow, very spiritual and you dad never gave the demons a second chance to come at him with pain and guilt, God bless and thank you.

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